(:

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

It's been quite some time since I last blogged
Blogging seems to have died down as a faze/craze
but I still think it's still an excellent option to keep blogging to keep my memories
though laziness gets the better of me for most of the time
I procrastinate not procrastinating
._.

I'm facing a crisis.
Okay maybe not exactly a crisis but I reached a crossroad in life once again, like the many previous time in the process of growing up.
I think of myself as someone with far sight.
Meaning that I look ahead of time into the future, instead of focusing on the present only.
The pros being I am able to map out my future path as much as it's within my control
The cons being that I'm never ever able to focus on the present wholeheartedly because I keep thinking about the future
Well bzz nevermind
Let's recount previous major decisions I've made in my short life of 20years thus far

The very first big decision I had to make with regards to shaping of my life and career happened post-psle.
my aggregate was 263 (I'm not boasting btw)
I practically had to choice to enter ANY school in singapore of my choice
My parents, though not explicitly, implied that I should go to either HCI or RI
Obviously the reason being that they were the premier secondary school to go to
but being in the top school didn't really sway me towards choosing them
Instead I thought about how I wanted my secondary school life to be
The thought of being in an all-boys school environment turned me off quite a bit
Not that I'm testosterone-phobic
Just that I don't think it will be good for development of my social behaviour
(Okay I did not think that way in the same few words, but the gist is something along that line)
It may be hard to believe but I was a very shy person in primary school and I hoped that it would change (it did!)
So I chose RVHS due to the proximity of school as compared to nanhua, or other SAP
On hindsight, that decision was a largely successful one cos I made many awesome friends and had an unforgettable experience in RV :D

Moving on, it's post olevel.
My L1R5 was 8
My initial choice was hci followed by njc and then acjc
I was in acjc for pae and went results came out I had to make a decision for jae.
I was pretty certain I didn't want to stay in ac primarily because the basketball team there wasn't as awesome as I hoped for it to be
Let's just ASSUME I could get into HCI if I did appeal
I thought about whether I should appeal into hci
I decided against it
It's a dumb reason but I stayed in0 nj mainly for the basketball
Academically it probably isn't as wise to do so
But I haven't been known to make choice with academic consideration
Though I didn't really like my environment in nj but I adopted a low profile life
And I quite liked that kind of feeling
on hindsight, it might not be the most sensible reason but at least I enjoyed my jc life
It didn't reap the results I hoped it would but it is unfair to blame the school for my inability

JC passed
NS wasn't a choice so I shall just skip that

Now, I'm facing yet another crossroad
1.5 months to the end of ns
I have a decision to make which I'll have to live with for the coming 3/4 years and indirectly affects my future and the years to come.
okay I've chosen the first junction 'LOCAL/OVERSEAS'
overseas uni isn't that viable an option for me primarily because of the financial liability it will bring to my family
Moreover, I'm too emotionally attached to my friends and family in singapore to be able to endure long periods away from them
Such a wimp right?
Whatever.
Okay so my remaining choice would be SMU NUS NTU..
Let's assume I have the required results to choose business for all 3
Honestly speaking I don't have a tendency towards either of the unis
But I have a secret aversion for SMU
I can't identify the cause of it but I just feel this way
Weird
So you may think I have narrowed my choices down to two BUT NO!
Prior to going into ns
I pictured myself having a super low-profile life in uni
Working parttime for extra pocket money and going out less
In short I'm trying to be someone I'm not
but it's really hard to just change all this within such a short time
But I would be able to benefit financially and consequentially my results will be better cos I won't have as much social activities
And it's like a stepping stone to life as working adult
Of course the temptation to go nus ntu stays
(I assume)There's more campus life in comparison to smu with less pretence as I can better be myself
and of course people always emphasize that uni campus life is EVERYTHING about uni
Zzz now I'm stuck at this crossroad I really can't weigh the pros and cons
But I have to make a decision and live with it real soon

Anybody wanna offer their worth of thoughts? :D

On a lighter note, life's been pretty much like a rollercoaster
There's always up and down
Just like a roller coaster, you never know where's the plunge when you are soaring up
But every plunge will sure be followed by a turn up
There's too many things that happened in this 2months plus to note it all down
But I'm glad things will be able to sort itself out soon (:
and I'm probably heading to cambodia, taiwan and korea at the end of this year! Awesome possum or what?

bernana5 @ 2:31 PM